|Laura Palmer at the Clifton's "In the Trees" Twin Peaks event (all pics are from this show)|
It took incessant begging and nagging and whining to get my parents to drive down to the WEST VILLAGE to open an account for me. ("Manhattan? The West Village? Whaaat? Are you nuts? I ain't goin in to the city!" My mother, like all Queens mother's, could think of nothing more undesirable than going to the city.)
One VHS tape at a time, one week at a time, one journey at a time, I rented TWIN PEAKS.
|David Lynch's Twin Peaks|
I bought blank VHS tapes at Blockbuster to copy them on our family's high-tech, state of the art VHS to VHS recorder.
I watched them over and over. My friends and I had all night TWIN PEAKS marathons. When I worked out on the treadmill in the basement, I popped in an episode of TWIN PEAKS. I was driven by its strangeness, it's quirky characters, the evil and the good, the beauty of the pacific northwest, the funky soundtrack, the dreams, the silences, the mystery and more than anything, the deep and true love for my soulmate, Special Agent Dale Cooper.
Fifteen years later, TWIN PEAKS is available to Watch Instantly on Netflix, I am living in Los Angeles, and there is a TWIN PEAKS art exhibit going on, one weekend only, at Clifton's Cafeteria, an immense downtown lunch spot made to look like a Giant Redwood Grove.
|waiting on gigantic line to get into Twin Peaks thing|
|alllll these people wanted in- Feb 11, 2011|
|Hmmm, I am both 15 and 30 at once, how odd! How Twin Peaksy!|
I was weird. I had blue hair, purple hair, rainbow hair, pink hair, bleached white hair. I fit in nowhere- I wasn't a punk, I wasn't normal, I wasn't a goth, I was nothing. I loved that Twin Peaks was strange because I was strange. I loved beautiful places, which I didn't get to see much of in Queens. I loved the simple little town of Twin Peaks, the waterfalls, the mill, the mountains, the forest, the owls, the Great Northern Hotel. I felt transported there.
|i loved this one. totally wanted to buy it.|
I wanted to be there, amongst these beautiful girls, like Shelley and Audrey, and Bobby, who I thought was the hottest fucking thing I'd ever seen.
But it was all about Special Agent Dale Cooper. He was the light of the show. He was upstanding and moral. He loved life. He devours Twin Peaks with glee in the same way I would. He stops everything- the world pauses- while he takes a sip of coffee or tastes a slice of pie.
I remember latching onto his quips of philosophy- "Nothing is so bad if you can just keep the fear from your mind," or, "when two separate events occur simultaneously pertaining to the same object of inquiry, we must always pay strict attention."
I loved everything he said to Diane, and his impulse to record, to share his every thought. I wanted to record my thoughts, my observations, I wanted to share them too.
I wanted to be just like him. I wanted to be fearless. I wanted to love life unabashedly. I wanted to be plowed over with joy at the sight of, "DUCKS! ON A LAKE!"
|classic Coop scene... love the trees!|
I loved the music, Audry closing her eyes and dancing.
|in the red room|
Audrey and Ben Horne blown up? Special Agent Dale Cooper is now BOB??? No way.
I think, every time I replayed the taped, grainy VHS episodes over and over, I think I skipped the last episode. I think I rejected it. I erased it from my memory, and I am pretty sure that's what I am going to do again.
I had a clear memory of Audrey leaving Twin Peaks with her pilot man and Special Agent Dale Cooper asking Annie to marry him on a boat on a lake. That was my ending.
I loved Dale Cooper and I wanted him to be happy.
Scarred as I was, I knew I had to watch Fire Walk With Me again. I could see, now, that Special Agent needed to be there, stuck in the Black Lodge, because he was the only one with the purity of heart enough to withstand it, to help Laura make her way to the White Lodge.
|my favorite painting of the evening|
|also my favorite title of the evening|
I still hope I can be just like Special Agent Dale Cooper. I'm not yet, but I'm a lot closer than when I was when I was fifteen.